First off I'd like to say that I have no problem with what is referred to usually as "ghetto speak". I don't use it because I'm a "well spoken Englishman" (heh) but I have no issues with other people using it. That is assuming they don't suddenly start speaking that way after 3 days of listening to Dre, Eminem, Snoop et al. Then it gets on my tits that they're just imitating a subculture they did not grow into and merely deem to be "cool". But I digress. My real issue in this rant is with the typers.

I've spent a few years now, on and off obliviously, being part of the world of IRC. Chatting is for the most part full of people speaking in clipped text - "Where r u going? bbl. wtf!" etc - which tends to be something you grow out of after a while and then only use sparingly. However some people push it too far. These are the ghetto-speak typers. I fail to see why you need to carry speech patterns into a text based medium. English as a written language should NOT vary from subculture to subculture You can't write business reports or letters in that manner of speaking and most people would be very distressed if you did. It's not some uptight white-boy problem, it's a fundamental part of society that you write in a fashion which is clear to everybody who may read it. Now these chatters, oh boy. They combine ghetto-speak with massive use of shorthand typing to produce an unintelligible mess. They're typing so few letters that they may as well not type anything at all. Hell, we'd stand a better chance at understanding what the fuck they're trying to say if they did.

These are the same people that feel the need to refer to everything as "that shit" or "their shit" (remember we're still talking about typing here boys & girls). As if implying and yet not implying an insult somehow makes everything equal. Words lose their meaning when you do this guys! How the hell are we supposed to know when you like or dislike something if everything is "shit"? There is little or no excuse for typing in such a bullshit (sic) fashion. Even worse is when they post on forums & messageboards like it. I mean what the hell? It's not like you need to be typing quickly to post a reply there. You have TIME, use it to type something that people won't disregard because it's illegible babble.

I heard someone submitted an entire English essay in clipped text the other week somewhere. Usually I disregard the cries of "the downfall of the written English language" but as I become more & more irritated by the morons on IRC who can't type out a legible sentence I must agree.

Peace yo bbl wit som shit.

Written to Nickleback - How You Remind Me